The Humorous side of living with Multiple Sclerosis
I know that MS is a serious and often debilitating disease, but I have managed to find some humor in the often strange and bizarre symptoms I have from time to time. My hope is not to offend anyone, I know for some people things are much worse and I am in no way belittling this horrible disease. But, I must make fun of myself.
If you’re not sure what Multiple Sclerosis is, it is an autoimmune disease. Your body’s immune system attacks the myelin sheath covering the nerves in your brain and spinal cord (your central nervous system). Think of the insulation covering a wire, the myelin is the insulation protecting your nerves and making the nerve signals that are being sent get to their destination. Without this protective cover, these signals either don’t reach their destination at all or they are severely disrupted. When your immune system attacks this cover it causes damage, sometimes to the point where the damage can’t repair itself. When the damage doesn’t heal that is what in most cases cause individuals with MS to become disabled.
There is no piece, part, section of your body that is immune to these affects. Think about it, your body is pretty much controlled by your central nervous system
Now that I have given you a quick rundown on the disease, I will share what I call the bizarre yet funny symptoms I have had.
I will start with what I call the “Darth Vader Luke Skywalker Affect” Anyone, who has seen Stars Wars remembers the sound that light sabers make while being swung in battle. This is a sound I often hear inside my head. It’s like Darth Vader and Luke Skywalker are having a duel. Just plain weird. No I am not crazy, I actually hear this sound. Not all the time but here and there. All I can do is laugh, trying to explain it to anyone would make me sound like I have schizophrenia, I mean who hears the sound of light sabers in there head, raising my hand “I do”. Why it happens I don’t know, I just know it’s damn funny.
Then there is the “cell phone buzzing in my pocket affect” I get weird vibrations in my legs, and I will actually reach for my cell phone, but it’s not my cell phone. You would think by now that I would know better seeing my cell phone doesn’t even fit in my pocket, but I fall for it every time like an idiot.
Then there is the symptom I call the “time warp”. I walk into things all the time, because for some reason my body is there before my brain realizes I’m about to walk into a wall, a door, a table. It has to do with the affects that MS has on my perception. I have heard this explained as a lack of awareness of the body’s position in space and spatial relationships. I think it is funny, I am definitely in outer space.
Then there is the “Pseudo bulbar Affect”, which causes people with MS to laugh or cry at inappropriate moments. I refer to it as the “Looney Tune Affect” I have been known to laugh at something really sad, something that will make someone else cry, I laugh at. Not because I don’t care, but because I can’t help it. It causes people to look at me quite strange sometimes, but I take it all in stride and just let them think I’m crazy. Sometimes I will just start laughing for no reason at all and can’t stop, but hey laughter is the best medicine right? It even happens to me when I am walking down the street, or on the train. However, it does have its benefits when riding the T, people think I’m nuts, so it’s almost a guaranteed seat on a packed train.
I can’t leave out the tremor. I was sitting in front of someone at work, (they didn't know I had MS). I happened to be holding a cup of coffee and my hand was shaking so bad I couldn't get the cup to my mouth, it shook so bad I spilled my coffee all over my shirt. I watched them staring at me, and I can only imagine that they were thinking “what the hell is wrong with this girl”. I didn't explain myself, it was funnier to see them trying not to notice, although clearly they did.
I have to say I am lucky, things could be much worse for me. I don’t feel sorry for myself I just take things as they come. There are many more affects that MS has on my body, I only wanted to share some of the things I find funny.